Be Your Own Miracle!

You Are Not A TV Star Yet

Thankfully we are not all the same. Each one of us have our own unique gifts, qualities, genetic traits, tastes, skin tones, accents, and other features that makes us individuals. The same is true for our fitness levels, weight loss issues, and overall health status. A common barrier to achieving optimal wellness is the belief that someone else is the same as you. We all have different chemical makeups, strengths, hormone levels and other traits that make us different, especially when it comes to weight loss. Some people “can eat anything” and never gain weight; some can lose weight faster than others despite what feels like a greater effort, and still more never have to exercise and still look great. What gives? Comparing yourself to others and feeling as though you have received an “unfair hand” from the “weight loss Gods” is a fast recipe for failure. It is NEVER you versus them. It is only YOU VERSUS YOU! 

See the little changes as they occur.

With the latest reality show or weight loss infomercial touting super-fast ways to lose weight, many people who believe these “get fit quick schemes” look for the fastest and easiest weight loss methods. With television shows displaying dramatic weight loss episodes of people losing as much as 20 pounds in a seven day period, many in the real world believe this is possible for them. But usually it is not realistic for someone who does not live on a wellness ranch or have the time to devote to several hours of exercise per day, is without a chef and/or doctor supervision. Most of us have families or significant others, full time jobs or go to school.. Additionally, it is generally not safe to lose weight too fast and in most cases the weight loss does not last for the long term. So it is a VERY WISE practice to pay attention to every little change that occurs. The successful person with significant and permanent weight loss will notice changes in strength whether it is in a workout or walking through the mall. As you modify your behaviors and begin this journey of wellness transformation, PLEASE notice the small changes from the way your pants fit to climbing the stairs to your increased energy level throughout the day. Remember where you are starting; some of the difficulties you’re having, the pain, tight clothes, fatigue and other symptoms that have led you on this mission to gain better health.

It is easy to get caught up in the belief that if they do it on TV or if someone else can eat any and all foods without gaining weight then you can too. Compare yourself only to yourself. Keep trying to achieve the wellness and wellbeing that you are capable of. Be NEVER GIVE UP resilient. BE YOUR OWN MIRACLE!

 

Miracles of Phoenix Fitness Owner Coe Kirby is a personal trainer and has a Master’s Degree in Community Counseling. He has helped hundreds of people overcome self-defeating behaviors and achieve goals of all levels. His unique style and skill set as a personal trainer and life coach make him comfortable for the client to be open with while pursuing the growth or change he or she desires. Knowing that each individual is different with where they are in the change process, he guides the client on a journey of self-discovery that helps the individual learn his or her own method to success while giving strong support and proven tools to assist them. His two books, Your Health is Your Wealth: Working Out the Inner Self For a Fit Outer Self and Rebuilding Your Temple From the Inside Out have helped people from all walks of life learn how to create healthier lifestyles for themselves and their families. Both books are available through http://www.amazon.com or http://www.miraclesofphoenixfitness.com  Good luck on your health journey!

 

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I DESERVE IT

Rewarding Yourself

Many of us have been given or chosen food as a reward for good behavior, a job well done, a long day, etc. The media and advertising also helps us with reward conditioning.  “You deserve a break today” was the slogan for a leading fast food chain. The commercial showed a woman with two children, her hair standing up, a frustrated look on her face and obviously overwhelmed. The commercial touched on the emotions of all who watched it but it did not promote healthy outlets—it promoted easy and even worse unhealthy eating practices. What happens with the person that has a rough day and wants to be healthy?  The person who wants to be healthy rewards themselves by treating the body with care and respect. This individual has re-conditioned his or her reward system to include healthy eating, responses to life events and yes—even a tough day. Reward yourself with long term good health and you may also teach the children in your life to respond the same way. You will be healthier, happier, and impact future generations. Way to go!

I Deserve It!

The “I deserve it’ thought process usually stems from two directions. The first example I will use is when we feel as though we have done something good and “deserve” to reward ourselves with “a treat.” Many of us have been conditioned to do this through sports, home or school activities as a youth when we have won a game or worked hard to achieve some level of success. The way that many of our brains work is that we get “locked into” telling ourselves that unhealthy food is a good reward. When we have had a good accomplishment in our day, gone through a tough exercise session, or worked extra hours it is very common for some of us to reward ourselves with unhealthy practices such as food.

The other “I deserve it” is created when we have not had such a great day or feel as though we have not been recognized properly, feel overwhelmed by events of the day, or feel as though we have been “done wrong” in some way in our lives. Having stress, anxiety, and sadness during our day will lead to the “I deserve it” response because of our automatic (brain locked in) way of coping with discomforting situations in our lives. The advertising geniuses at companies that promote unhealthy eating practices play on our emotions to billion dollar profits for them and poor health for many of us.

What You Truly Deserve

            Everyone that I know works hard and are generally good people. They devote their lives to career and families and often neglect personal health and self-care. The “I deserve it” that you do actually deserve is a healthy life. You deserve to spend your hard earned money on vacations and things that you can enjoy with long term good health practices. You deserve to play with your grandchildren, to walk normally and without pain, and the happiness that good health brings. Your family and those who love you also deserve someone who cares for their health and does not cause extra work or burden prematurely.  Begin to create the life and health you deserve as soon as possible. Begin to be your own miracle!

Miracles of Phoenix Fitness Owner Coe Kirby is a personal trainer and has a Master’s Degree in Community Counseling. He has helped hundreds of people overcome self-defeating behaviors and achieve goals of all levels. His unique style and skill set as a personal trainer and life coach make him comfortable for the client to be open with while pursuing the growth or change he or she desires. Knowing that each individual is different with where they are in the change process, he guides the client on a journey of self-discovery that helps the individual learn his or her own method to success while giving strong support and proven tools to assist them. His two books, Your Health is Your Wealth: Working Out the Inner Self For a Fit Outer Self and Rebuilding Your Temple From the Inside Out have helped people from all walks of life learn how to create healthier lifestyles for themselves and their families. Both books are available through http://www.amazon.com or http://www.miraclesofphoenixfitness.com  Good luck on your health journey!

 

 

Be A Loser!

I have had the opportunity to experience many things in life that can be categorized as wins, losses, successes, or failures. I scored the winning run in a Little League game and made an error that helped the other team score the winning run in another. I failed or dropped out of college 6 times and graduated with honors and earned a Master’s Degree. I have lived in seedy motels, my car and didn’t know where my next dime is coming from. I have been paid above six figures and lived well financially. I was taught like many of us that winning the game is good and losing the game is bad. I learned early that if I was average in school and brought home a C, I would not “see” the light of day for a while and I don’t even want to talk about the day I brought home an F. Failure was bad and harsh punishment was mandatory, especially my own self-punishment. Many people that I speak with feel the same way and harshly self-punish when “failing” at something. It is the way we were taught, agreed with, and adopted as fact.

Congratulations, You Screwed Up!

In my mid-thirties my life course took a different direction. I had worked at various positions up to this point and I tried my best and did well at all of them, except when I failed at something and harshly punished myself for the error. That is when I met Greg who had hired me as a windows salesman. I would sell customers custom made, high quality residential windows and doors. I was responsible for writing the order correctly, measuring the openings, and submitting the order for review. My first order I got correct. My second order I screwed up everything but my name. As I made the long walk to Greg’s office, ruminating about what a failure I was, how I should start looking for another job, and how being a salesman probably was “too hard” for me, I saw Greg’s smile. He said, “What’s up? You look like you’ve lost your best friend.” I told him about how I had screwed up the order and sincerely said I was sorry. He continued to smile and when I was finished he stood up from his desk and I knew I was done as a salesman. But he stuck his hand out and said, “Congratulations you just screwed up on one order more than most people do in five or six. This is so great!” Great? I looked at him for signs of intoxication but there were none. Greg is a brilliant businessman and he was serious. He liked my mistakes.

Learning From Losing

Greg instilled in me that mistakes are good and should be learned from. Each mistake that we make is an opportunity to grow as a person and can be utilized in any walk of life. That does not mean we do not try your best all of the time, but humans make mistakes. It is reality. I continue to learn from the mistakes I make in my life. When I have a day where I make less than healthy choices with food and exercise, I learn that I need better preparation, more sleep, stronger focus, supportive environments, and not to bring the unhealthy food into the house, among other things. I also learned to not hold onto guilt or shame and to move forward and start over. I am human and will make decisions that I need to learn from. For years, if I was trying to be healthy and had a “bad” few days, guilt and shame would set in and it became a revolving door scenario. It NEVER changed until I changed the way that I viewed “failure.”

You’re A Winner!

You will make mistakes and be a human. You will have days where you make less than healthy choices, yell at the guy in the other car, defend your point with your spouse to the brink of breakup, and be a couch potato. You can choose to learn from your mistakes like Greg and so many successful people in business, sports, politics, window sales, and wellness do. You can congratulate yourself for totally screwing up. You can be your own miracle!

Miracles of Phoenix Fitness Owner Coe Kirby is a personal trainer and has a Master’s Degree in Community Counseling. He has helped hundreds of people overcome self-defeating behaviors and achieve goals of all levels. His unique style and skill set as a personal trainer and life coach make him comfortable for the client to be open with while pursuing the growth or change he or she desires. Knowing that each individual is different with where they are in the change process, he guides the client on a journey of self-discovery that helps the individual learn his or her own method to success while giving strong support and proven tools to assist them. His two books, Your Health is Your Wealth: Working Out the Inner Self For a Fit Outer Self and Rebuilding Your Temple From the Inside Out have helped people from all walks of life learn how to create healthier lifestyles for themselves and their families. Both books are available through http://www.amazon.com or http://www.miraclesofphoenixfitness.com  Good luck on your health journey!

The Best Exercise and Nutrition Advice Ever!

I have been asked several times why I do not give out exercise or nutrition advice on my blog. After all, I am a personal trainer. I always try my best to accommodate everyone and I will do so with this request. My exercise advice is to do it. My nutrition advice is to eat primarily lean proteins, fruits, and vegetables or eat less of everything. I know this is groundbreaking stuff so I hope that you were not overwhelmed with the advice or if you were you were sitting down as you read it! When I weighed over 300 pounds I knew I was supposed to exercise and eat healthier. I knew I shouldn’t smoke cigarettes or do the other unhealthy things I was doing but I did it anyway and did not exercise. I understand also in today’s world of never ending temptation and ways to justify skipping an exercise session that it is not easy to always do. DO IT ANYWAY! AND ENJOY IT! Whoops went into angry personal trainer person for a moment but it is true. Many personal trainers and others have diets, shakes, and prepackaged meal plans but what if you don’t like what they chose for you to eat? I personally do not like cardboard or a shake that leaves my tongue swollen. I have come across many people who feel the same as I do and who actually want to like the food they consume. In addition, many of these same people do not want to exercise like they are in preparation for the police academy or the 2016 Olympics. So how does one achieve health and wellness goals without becoming miserable? Here are my nutrition and exercise tips to help you achieve your goals:

  1. It is true that we should eat primarily lean proteins, fruits, and vegetables or eat smaller. Choose things that you like that are healthier or introduce yourself to new food. I know people who have lost over 70 pounds by eating an oatmeal cookie for breakfast, a salad for lunch, and a meat and vegetable for dinner. I know others who have lost significant amounts of weight by trying new salads, ways to prepare meat, and going online before entering the restaurant to make sure there is a healthier option to enjoy. Change what you’re hungry for. Be hungry for success in your health journey!
  2. I know people that hate any form of exercise. I do not get up in the morning jumping up and down saying, “Yea! I get to run 5 miles!” Most of the people I know do not get so excited about exercise either. But those who have enacted great wellness change at the bare minimum saw a great benefit to doing exercise. You do not have to spend hours of misery in the gym with judgmental muscle heads or run endless miles in the desert. Spend 20 minutes a day helping yourself with exercise and you will see change. The key is to stay focused on the benefits. I have a friend who runs 5-10 miles a day and others who swim, walk, or play Wii. Find yours! Please do not wish you would have.
  3. Stay resilient. All of the people who I have witnessed make big changes kept fighting. They learned how not to give into the “old way” of doing things that did not lead to success. And if they did fall off for a day or two they regrouped and got right back on. And you can too. You are no different than the many people that I have worked with that have achieved wellness goals after years of struggle. You can do anything you choose if you have a reason big enough. I want to be healthy and strong as long as I can. I also have people that love me so I do not want to impact them with burden, stress, or worry because of my poor health choices. Those are my reasons for staying resilient and now it is time to find yours! It is time to create the health that you deserve and finally feel better! It is time to be your own miracle!

 

Miracles of Phoenix Fitness Owner Coe Kirby is a personal trainer and has a Master’s Degree in Community Counseling. He has helped hundreds of people overcome self-defeating behaviors and achieve goals of all levels. His unique style and skill set as a personal trainer and life coach make him comfortable for the client to be open with while pursuing the growth or change he or she desires. Knowing that each individual is different with where they are in the change process, he guides the client on a journey of self-discovery that helps the individual learn his or her own method to success while giving strong support and proven tools to assist them. His two books, Your Health is Your Wealth: Working Out the Inner Self For a Fit Outer Self and Rebuilding Your Temple From the Inside Out have helped people from all walks of life learn how to create healthier lifestyles for themselves and their families. Both books are available through http://www.amazon.com or http://www.miraclesofphoenixfitness.com  Good luck on your health journey!

Who Are You Talking To?

Whether we are aware of it or not, we are talking to ourselves (don’t worry it is normal) throughout the day. We tell ourselves it is okay to do certain things, tell ourselves it is not okay to do other things, daydream, make judgments of ourselves and others, and prioritize tasks. We also talk to ourselves when it comes to our food choices and the way we use food in life. Many times we will “talk ourselves into” bad food choices or “talk ourselves out of” good food choices. We use A LOT of reasons to justify the choices as I did for years. We say I deserve it because I had a tough day or I deserve it because I did something great. The “I deserve it” reward system if it is used because of self-pity or great accomplishment is one way our own talk with ourselves will sabotage our goals of great health and quality of life. For most of us, this has been a practice we have perfected over many years, probably since childhood. How we have “made it okay” with our self-talk to make unhealthy choices with food has played a key role in the health status we are in today and what it will be in the future. Changing the AUTOMATIC words we say to ourselves when we are justifying our food choices will play a key role in you achieving the weight and wellness goals that you so strongly desire.

Hardwired

            It is amazing how the human brain and body work. It is way more complex than just a matter of choice. We have genetics that make us predisposed to gain weight if we eat bad, be tall or short, respond in certain ways to stress and anxiety, and keep or lose our hair (mine is lost). Some people may call this being “hardwired.” We have also taught ourselves how to cope with events in life and it has become AUTOMATIC based on how we talk to ourselves. When our hardwired genetics and AUTOMATIC unhealthy coping choices meet and have done so for many years, many of us struggle to change. I struggled for the first 38 years of my life and was miserable. I couldn’t lose weight, stop eating sugars, or quit smoking. I got up to 340 lbs., was depressed much of the time, anxious all of the time, and showed it. I have met many people over the years who have this same issue and have learned healthier ways to enjoy life. So how do you change after struggling for years and are hardwired to be a certain way? Much of it happens when we change the talk to ourselves.

Rewire Your Talk

            I wish I could rewire the fact that I have lost much of my hair. It bothered me for years so I wore hats and tried many treatments. I think most of the treatments leaked into my ears, eyebrows, and yes back (I know TMI). I eventually had to accept that I was losing my hair and there was not much I could do about it. I, and the others who I have witnessed create big lifestyle change after years of struggle also had to accept that we are hardwired to gain weight easily, love sugars to an extreme, and use self-talk to justify some of the choices that we make. The difference with this and my hair is that we can change with the way we respond in life, the health choices that we make, and the self-talk we use to make those choices. Acceptance is always the first step in change but action is the key to the rest. Here are a few of the action steps that people used to make big lifestyle change after accepting the fact that change was needed:

  1. All changed the “I deserve it” reward system and the self-talk associated with that. This does not mean that you do not deserve good things and rewards. You work hard, help others, and are a good person. Changing the way you use and see the word deserve is a great way to do that. Many have changed the “I deserve its” into self-talk like this:
  • “I deserve great health and quality of life.”
  • “I deserve to fit into a smaller size.”
  • “I deserve to be able to move better.”

Or whatever works for your health journey.

  1. All changed what they are hungry for. For many of us, food has been a priority in our lives and what we have been “hungry for.” The people that have made major lifestyle changes have changed the way they use and see the word hunger. Instead of feeding the hunger for sugary food and drinks, all developed a strong hunger for change. Wanting to be healthy for themselves and others, being able to move with less effort and pain, and witnessing others who struggle are some of the reasons the new “hunger” was developed. Become hungry for change!
  2. All stayed resilient! Many of us know how to set a goal but do not know how to reach the goal. It is not that we are failures but merely do not know how to fail. You will have a day where you do not make the best choices. You are human. Start each day fresh, learn from the previous day without harsh judgment of yourself, and do not dwell on the unhealthy choice you may have made. The key is to “get right back on” when you fall off and focus on the hunger that you have for success!

I sincerely hopes this helps some of you who may struggle with maintaining a long term health focus. It is hard no question in today’s world. But you can change like so many others if you desire. You can create the health and the quality of life you deserve. You can be your own miracle!

Miracles of Phoenix Fitness Owner Coe Kirby is a personal trainer and holds a Master’s Degree in Community Counseling. He has helped hundreds of people overcome self-defeating behaviors and achieve goals of all levels. His unique style and skill set as a personal trainer and life coach make him comfortable for the client to be open with while pursuing the growth or change he or she desires. Knowing that each individual is different with where they are in the change process, he guides the client on a journey of self-discovery that helps the individual learn his or her own method to success while giving strong support and proven tools to assist them. His two books, Your Health is Your Wealth: Working Out the Inner Self For a Fit Outer Self and Rebuilding Your Temple From the Inside Out have helped people from all walks of life learn how to create healthier lifestyles for themselves and their families. Both books are available through http://www.amazon.com or http://www.miraclesofphoenixfitness.com  Good luck on your health journey!

 

Staying In the Game!

It is so important to educate yourself if you are going to continue to move forward in your wellness journey. One thing I ask of my fitness clients is to bring articles that they have read that are fitness and/or health related. It helps them to educate themselves about wellness and to “stay in the game” mentally outside of the gym. We have discussions while we exercise and we grow in both health mindset and knowledge.

This week we learned (again) how important it is to stay strong physically as we age. We lose muscle mass, bone density, clearness of mind, and sex drive as we get older (we know). Strength training will not only help us to be as strong physically as we can be past 40, but also strong mentally. Yes strength training! Exercising with weights can improve strength in bones, muscles, focus, sex drive, and even memory if done correctly. That in turn will help you with self-esteem, create a happy and healthy mindset, and reduce the length of recovery if you have an injury or illness. Walking is great and necessary but do not neglect the strength training.

The second article that I will share is how important outlook is when exercising.  Researchers had two groups who exercised in the same manner but were told two different things about the exercise. One group was basically told it was a “workout” while the other was given music, told to be social, and were educated regularly about the benefits of the exercise. The second group not only had better results physically but also made better choices with nutrition. “The way we see the world creates the world we see.” Please see exercise as beneficial. Most of the time exercise is more about learning how to cope with uncomfortable situations in life more than anything else. Learn how to work through 30-60 minutes of discomfort with exercise and it will help you learn how to deal with a lifetime of uncomfortable situations. Our coping skills need a workout too!

Another article that really touched me and our groups was how much more money it is going to cost children who are obese in health care spending as they get older. Some estimates are predicting that those who struggle with weight and making good health choices as a child will spend 2-3 times more on medications, surgeries, doctor copays, and other medical needs related to lifestyle choices. Overcoming childhood obesity is so hard and if you develop a food based reward or coping system your struggles may last forever. Please teach your children about the importance of good health choices and lead by example. It will save a life and money!

I hope that the articles inspire and educate you! I know that making good health choices in today’s world is hard, especially if you have had years of making less than healthy choices. Feel free to contact me if you struggle with making good health choices, food or other addictions, depression, lack of direction in life, ADHD issues, or harsh self-judgment. I struggled for years with many things and had the greatest teachers to help me grow. It is okay to ask for help. I needed to. If you need an ear that listens or just a different workout based on where you are in life, contact me @ miraclesfitness@gmail.com. The prices are the most affordable anywhere and the programs are evidenced based and highly successful.

Miracles of Phoenix Fitness Owner Coe Kirby holds a Master’s Degree in Counseling Psychology and has helped hundreds of people overcome self-defeating behaviors and achieve goals of all levels. His unique style and skill set as a personal trainer and life coach make him comfortable for the client to be open with while pursuing the growth or change he or she desires. Knowing that each individual is different with where they are in the change process, he guides the client on a journey of self-discovery that helps the individual learn his or her own method to success while giving strong support and proven tools to assist them. His two books, Your Health is Your Wealth: Working Out the Inner Self For a Fit Outer Self and Rebuilding Your Temple From the Inside Out have helped people from all walks of life learn how to create healthier lifestyles for themselves and their families. Both books are available through http://www.amazon.com or http://www.miraclesofphoenixfitness.com  Good luck on your health journey!